Like tears in rain – v6 #BladeRunner #Alzheimers #Dementia

A silent scream of loss, of regret,
of losing control, existence,
in our inner self, our identity,
Flowing out of us, pouring,
Becoming perfect, dissolution…
into a great unknown…

Like tears in rain, waters intermingled,
melting, sharing, dissolving, dispersing,
moments, lost in oblivion, in minutes,
falling into nothingness, union,
Who we were in life…
seemingly Lost in time...

Our lives, our memories, our essence,
becoming part of a vast ocean, water,
the pool of the universe, matter,
of time and infinite space,
An expiration date, a release…
Eternity, a pool deep, profound...

Like tears in rain, waters intermingled,
melting, sharing, dissolving, dispersing,
moments, lost in oblivion, in minutes,
falling into nothingness, union,
Who we were in life…
seemingly Lost in time...

One with the living waters, blending,
a place of peace and happiness,
Eternity, an ocean, spreading,
perfect dilution, immortality -
Heaven, becoming eternal…
one with the universe…

When it is our time to die…

--------
Edited September 12, 2025
Like tears in rain – v6

Edited February 11, 2024
Like tears in rain – v5
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/like-tears-in-rain-v5.html
Edited February 8, 2024
Like tears in rain – v4
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/like-tears-in-rain-v4.html
February 8, 2024
A Clear Day
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/a-clear-day.html
About the Sunday before Mom passed on Friday
(see highlighted notes below)
and after reading the poem, “Alzheimer’s”
by Anthony Walton
&
Edited June 28, 2022
Like tears in rain – v3
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v3.html
Edited June 27, 2022
Like tears in rain – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-im-rain-v2.html
Edited June 26, 2022
Like tears in rain
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain.html
Edited June 25, 2022
Like tears in the rain – v2
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v2.html
June 25, 2022
(Like) Tears in the rain
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/tears-in-rain.html
Blade Runner at 40
Rutger Hauer's monologue as Roy Batty
(It even has a Wikipedia page)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tears_in_rain_monologue

All of my poems, photographs, and videos are copyrighted by Raymond A. Foss, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024, and 2025. All rights are reserved. Contact me at Ray Foss (raymondafoss@gmail.com)  for usage. See all of my poems at www.raymondafoss.blogspot.com Poetry Where You Live.
 
poetry, God, Alzheimers, Blade Runner, legacy, faith, Spirit, soul, time, memories, life, immortality, eternal, struggle, dementia,

#poetry #God #Alzheimers #BladeRunner #legacy #faith #Spirit #soul #time #memories #life #immortality #eternal #struggle #dementia #disease #Alzheimer #alzheimersdisease

a latent danger

Fear below the surface, hidden,
buried in our DNA,
the curse of losing memory,
of losing ourselves…
 
the roulette wheel silent
wanting to spin, to find out,
if the ball will fall on my spot
or will I dodge the bullet…
 
a deep wound, a fear,
are the odds stacked against us
what is that probability that
we will lose all of us…

-----
May 10, 2025
a latent danger
 
Based on #Romans8:14-15
and history of vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease
in my mother’s side of the family
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 5
May 10, 2025
That sword of Damocles
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/that-sword-of-damocles.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 5
May 10, 2025
Remove these scales
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/remove-scales.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 4
May 10, 2025
Cataracts
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/cataracts.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 4
May 10, 2025
every thought that wells up
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/every-thought-that-wells-up.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 3
May 10, 2025
Anger
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/anger.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 2
Edited May 9, 2025
Put to death my sin – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/put-to-death-my-sin-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 1
Edited May 9, 2025
show your cards
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/show-your-cards.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Inventory Workbook Introduction
Edited May 9, 2025
leave no stone unturned – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/leave-no-stone-unturned-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Appendix C, Abuse Supplement
Edited May 9, 2025
Cathartic – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/cathartic-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 5
Edited May 8, 2025
Help me to remember – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/help-me-to-remember-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 5
Edited May 8, 2025
the weight of that burden – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/the-weight-of-that-burden-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 3
Edited May 8, 2025
the anger I carried – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/the-anger-i-carried-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 3
 
All of my poems, photographs, and videos are copyrighted by Raymond A. Foss, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024, and 2025. All rights are reserved. Contact me at Ray Foss (raymondafoss@gmail.com)  for usage. See all 53,000+ of my poems at www.raymondafoss.blogspot.com Poetry Where You Live.
 
==================
Poetry, God, Christ, Spirit, regeneration, Romans 8, fear, dementia, Alzheimer,
 
#poetry #God #Christ #Spirit #fear #dementia #Alzheimers

That Sword of Damocles

That sword of Damocles,
a ticking time bomb,
a minefield before me,
that curse, that marker,
that latent danger lurking,
just below the water line
an ancient fear nascent,
that may yet be revealed...
 
Unspoken terror, oblivion,
urges me on in this moment
sharing fervently, gifted,
knowing only the present
the threat remains hidden
outside of my vision
a sword of Damocles remaining
just out of reach...

-----
May 10, 2025
That sword of Damocles
 
Based on #Romans8:14-15
and history of vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease
in my mother’s side of the family
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 5
May 10, 2025
Remove these scales
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/remove-scales.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 4
May 10, 2025
Cataracts
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/cataracts.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 4
May 10, 2025
every thought that wells up
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/every-thought-that-wells-up.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 3
May 10, 2025
Anger
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/anger.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 2
Edited May 9, 2025
Put to death my sin – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/put-to-death-my-sin-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Day 1
Edited May 9, 2025
show your cards
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/show-your-cards.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 2, Inventory Workbook Introduction
Edited May 9, 2025
leave no stone unturned – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/leave-no-stone-unturned-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Appendix C, Abuse Supplement
Edited May 9, 2025
Cathartic – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/cathartic-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 5
Edited May 8, 2025
Help me to remember – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/help-me-to-remember-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 5
Edited May 8, 2025
the weight of that burden – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/the-weight-of-that-burden-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 3
Edited May 8, 2025
the anger I carried – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2025/05/the-anger-i-carried-v2.html
re:generation, Step 4, Inventory, Week 1, Day 3
 
All of my poems, photographs, and videos are copyrighted by Raymond A. Foss, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024, and 2025. All rights are reserved. Contact me at Ray Foss (raymondafoss@gmail.com)  for usage. See all 53,000+ of my poems at www.raymondafoss.blogspot.com Poetry Where You Live.
 
==================
Poetry, God, Christ, Spirit, regeneration, Romans 8, fear, dementia, Alzheimer,
 
#poetry #God #Christ #Spirit #fear #dementia #Alzheimers

Like tears in rain – v5

Like tears in rain, waters intermingled,
melting, sharing, dissolving, dispersing,
moments, lost in oblivion, in minutes,
falling into nothingness, union,
Seemingly Lost in time...
 
Our lives, our memories, our essence,
becoming part of a vast ocean, water,
the pool of the universe, matter,
of time and infinite space,
Eternity, a pool deep, profound...
 
Like tears in rain, waters intermingled,
melting, dissolving, dispersing,
moments, lost in oblivion, in minutes,
falling into nothingness, union,
Seemingly Lost in time...
 
One with the living waters, blending,
a place of peace and happiness,
Eternity, an ocean, spreading,
perfect dilution, immortality -
nirvana, becoming eternal…
 
When it is our time to die.
 
------------  
Edited February 11, 2024
Like tears in rain – v5
 
Edited February 8, 2024
Like tears in rain – v4
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/like-tears-in-rain-v4.html
February 8, 2024
A Clear Day
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/a-clear-day.html
About the Sunday before Mom passed on Friday
(see highlighted notes below)
and after reading the poem, “Alzheimer’s”
by Anthony Walton
&
Edited June 28, 2022
Like tears in rain – v3
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v3.html
Edited June 27, 2022
Like tears in rain – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-im-rain-v2.html
Edited June 26, 2022
Like tears in rain
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain.html
Edited June 25, 2022
Like tears in the rain – v2
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v2.html
June 25, 2022
(Like) Tears in the rain
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/tears-in-rain.html
Blade Runner at 40
Rutger Hauer monologue as Roy Batty
(it even has a Wikipedia page)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tears_in_rain_monologue
 
All of my poems, photographs, and videos are copyrighted by Raymond A. Foss, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, and 2024. All rights are reserved. Contact me at Ray Foss (raymondafoss@gmail.com)  for usage. See all 53,000+ of my poems at www.raymondafoss.blogspot.com Poetry Where You Live.
 
poetry, God, Alzheimers, Blade Runner, legacy, faith, Spirit, soul, time, memories, life, immortality, eternal, struggle, dementia, disease, Alzheimer, Alzheimer’s Disease,
 
#poetry #God #Alzheimers #bladerunner #legacy #faith #Spirit #soul #time #memories #life #immortality #eternal #struggle #dementia #disease #Alzheimer #alzheimersdisease
 

A Clear Day – v2 #Alzheimers

I wasn’t the one beside you,
my sisters, the others,
as the disease stole you from us,
from yourself, your identity, your history,
from your story, from who you were.
 
No, I was the one far away,
from your struggle, your journey,
the distant first child, your son.
After a while, I was afraid, fearful,
That, if I called, you wouldn’t know me.
 
Oh, what a blessing, a gift,
from God, from eternity,
that when I spoke to you,
in your final days, that week,
You said that you love me.
 
What a joy for a clear day,
sure in your voice, your speaking,
with loved ones beside you,
Singing songs to our Savior,
Knowing you were heading home.
 
--------------------
Edited February 8, 2024
A Clear Day – v2
 
Edited February 8, 2024
Like tears in rain – v4
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/like-tears-in-rain-v4.html
February 8, 2024
A Clear Day
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/02/a-clear-day.html
About the Sunday before Mom passed on Friday
(see highlighted notes below)
and after reading the poem, “Alzheimer’s”
by Anthony Walton
&
Edited June 28, 2022
Like tears in rain – v3
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v3.html
Edited June 27, 2022
Like tears in rain – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-im-rain-v2.html
Edited June 26, 2022
Like tears in rain
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain.html
Edited June 25, 2022
Like tears in the rain – v2
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/like-tears-in-rain-v2.html
June 25, 2022
(Like) Tears in the rain
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/06/tears-in-rain.html
&
edited March 13, 2015
Struggle – v3
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2015/03/struggle-v3.html
edited November 27, 2014
Struggle – v2
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2014/11/struggle-v2.html
Thanksgiving Day
August 18, 2004 21:53
Struggle
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2004/08/struggle.html
&
Edited January 14, 2024
Dripping with memory – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2024/01/dripping-with-memory-v2.html
January 19, 2022
Dripping with memory
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/01/dripping-with-memory.html
&
January 11, 2022
Older than dad ever was
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/01/older-than-dad-ever-was.html
January 4, 2022
just before the mandates, the pandemic
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2022/01/just-before-mandates-pandemic.html
January 10, 2020
Obituary for Patricia Ann Ring Foss Cobb
https://www.cremationsocietyofsc.com/obituaries/Patricia-Cobb-2/#!/Obituary
https://www.eagletimes.com/obituaries/patricia-a-ring-foss-cobb/article_648ce713-d56b-541f-b6c2-ba2932501331.html
January 25, 2020
my Facebook post:
https://www.facebook.com/raymond.a.foss/posts/10157231482093003
So blessed to be able to attend and participate in the Celebration of Life for mom today at Grace River. I cannot express how much I appreciate the love and caring shown by those who attended and/or those who sent flowers, thoughts, and prayers to our family over the last two weeks.
Here are my notes for my time of sharing - for Celebration of Life of Patricia Ann Ring Foss Cobb:
Good morning, thank you for coming, for showing us all your love for Mom and for us all by being here today. For those who don’t know me, I’m Ray, mom and dad’s oldest. When I came along on April Fool’s Day 1960, Mom was twenty-five. A fact that was really problematic when I myself was twenty-five, because that meant mom was FIFTY…
I am definitely Mom and Dad’s son – analytical like dad (wanting to do it right), but I start tasks like mom (want it done)… Unfortunately that means (for me), that I am great at starting things, but not so good at finishing (sort of like the custom kitchen cabinets that dad started building for mom in the kitchen that weren’t done until shortly before we moved…).
When I got the call from Sandy and Becky that Mom had gone home to heaven two weeks ago today at about midnight, I was sad that she was gone but I was so joyful for the end of this journey for mom, just as I had been for Grammy Ring.
I was so happy for the clear day that God had gifted us the prior Sunday when I got to talk with mom twice, saying I love you and her saying I love you, how Sandy and I made a joyful noise singing Jesus Loves Me to her. She said a strong “Yes” when we talked a second time that she knew she was a child of God, that she was ready to go home to heaven, that she knew God the Father, Jesus, and all her loved ones who had gone before were waiting to greet her home.
Mom was the first one who loved me, who taught me about God and Jesus. She was active in her faith. My first memory of that was in the Methodist church in Westfield, at some young adults youth group or something. After we moved to Second Congregational, she was active there too. I never doubted her love for me, her encouraging me all throughout my life, and I always knew just how strong her depth of faith was, how important God and Christ were in her life.
She was my first teacher, the one who taught me to love books, who pushed me to do more in school. She was my typist too, before I learned to type. I don’t know how many times she and I were up late or up early working on a school paper I pushed to the last minute.
Mom was my constant in my life. She was the homeroom parent when I went to Abner Gibbs School. Years later she laughed in sharing with me that I called her Mrs. Foss when she was at school and mom when she was at home. I guess I needed both of them.
One special thing we shared, started with my Sunday School and Grammy Foss was May Day baskets. On May 1 every year for 55 years, I would give mom a May Day basket. In the early years on Squawfield Road, they would be maple tree flowers, tulips and dandelions. One year, when she was working for Dave, her “basket” was faxed to her at Communication Connections.
More than her faith, if that is possible, family was everything to mom, something that the Ring family certainly taught her. The connection was so real, the love and joy so palpable, even when we were all crammed into their small dining room as the family grew. That was so special.
Like everything, mom didn’t do things halfway. She worked hard in everything she did. That was something she learned from her mom and dad too. When Grampa got done with the YMCA in Westfield, they replaced him with three people.
Like Grammy Foss, who was known as the Cookie Lady in Springfield, mom cared for others, offering her life to share love with others, starting with family, through her faith life, and continuing as a CNA after she cared for Grammy Ring.
One story about her wanting things done… I came home from YMCA Camp Shepard in Westfield one summer day to find mom and Grampa Ring, one with a crowbar and one with a pry-bar, getting ready to take down the outside wall between the kitchen and the porch. Dad, if memory serves, came in to have it done his way. And I remember the work to do the transition between the floors of the kitchen and the porch (because they didn’t match).
Mom always showed her love in so many ways. In 1969, I had to have knee surgery. She was there with me throughout the three months I was at home in my full-length cast. She even took me around for trick or treat for UNICEF, because I wasn’t going to go out at night for regular trick or treating. The only downside was that the TV and my chair were in the same room, so I watched her soap operas too.
I left home at 18 years old in 1978 to go to UNH. I remember leaving mom and dad almost at the curb when I checked into my dorm, Gibbs Hall. They had taught me and had given me wings. I was ready to fly.
I went home in summer of 1979 and worked at Holsum Bakery on the roll oven. That was the last time I lived at home. I worked crazy hours and I’m sure I must have been a grumpy older brother to Matt and Becky, as the tv room was next to my bedroom.
Mom taught me civic mindedness, something that led me to student government at UNH, to working with and for non-profits through my work life and running for the School Board. She and I would often talk politics, which was always interesting because we often voted differently.
I remember so well mom and dad being Baptized here in the fall of 1990. I was so glad to be here with my siblings to watch that moment, as I was so glad to be here for mom and Richard’s wedding fifteen years after dad died.
I am so joyful for the way God gifted all of us for the time in January 1991, after Sandy and Peter and family were gifted time that Christmas, with mom and dad at Sugarloaf. We all got to be together sharing skiing and family time on that mountain dad loved. I remember so well mom posing for pictures in her outfit that fit her so well. And I so remember the last time I saw mom and dad together, when all of the rest of us headed home. They stayed an extra day at Sugarloaf Inn. The last image I have of them was mom and dad like a pair of teenage lovers skiing off together with smiles on their faces.
Mom and I returned to Sugarloaf March 2, 2001, to spreading dad’s ashes there. We spoke aloud her name and the names of all of us children as we released his remains to the mountain and to the wind.
And, Mom, we will be going back to that mountain later this year to spread yours remains there too, joining your physical body with dad’s, just as you today are at home in heaven with him and all of our loved ones who passed before you did.
&
edited February 20, 2021
A perfect week – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-perfect-week-v2.html
merged, edited February 20, 2021
In the arms of the mountain – v2
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2021/02/in-arms-of-mountain-v2.html
February 20, 2021
in the arms of the mountain
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2021/02/in-arms-of-mountain.html
February 20, 2021
A week on your mountain
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-week-on-your-mountain.html
February 20, 2021
A perfect week
https://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-perfect-week.html
&
June 17, 2018
It seems like yesterday
http://raymondafoss.blogspot.com/2018/06/it-seems-like-yesterday.html
Fathers’ Day
about our ski trip together January 1991
before my father’s black ice fatal accident
Valentine’s Day – February 14, 1991
 
 
All of my poems, photographs, and videos are copyrighted by Raymond A. Foss, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, and 2024. All rights are reserved. Contact me at Ray Foss (raymondafoss@gmail.com)  for usage. See all 53,000+ of my poems at www.raymondafoss.blogspot.com Poetry Where You Live.
 
Sugarloaf, Maine, poem, poetry, skiing, father, God, love, memories, mountain, Nature, Poetry Where You Live, snow, winter, mile marker 19, family,
 
#Sugarloaf #Maine #skiing #poem #poetry #father #God #hope #love #memories #mountain #Nature #snow #wind #winter #ashes #family #son #mother #wife #husband
 
---------------
 
poetry, God, Alzheimers, Blade Runner, legacy, faith, Spirit, soul, time, memories, life, immortality, eternal, struggle, dementia, disease, Alzheimer, Alzheimer’s Disease,
 
#poetry #God #Alzheimers #bladerunner #legacy #faith #Spirit #soul #time #memories #life #immortality #eternal #struggle #dementia #disease #Alzheimer #alzheimersdisease